Intentions are unconscious at best and the outcome delivered rather than that which is anticipated is typically less ideal than the visualization.
Unrest, I suppose that is why it is here that I spill my viewpoint as it is clearly past due. As the current ground in which I stand is shaky, maybe I simply need rest.
My temperament is unsteady and I am fueled to release as soon as I digest.
Yet there is a blockage, one in my soul. No I don’t feel whole.
Allow me to expand on that point of view.
For I was but a troubled spirit, haunting the hillsides till I met you.
You found my body, as soon as it met you.
What a moment that was. For us all, don’t you remember?
When you softly embraced your warm lover, many memories that will never surrender.
Trivial and fanatic, maybe that’s why the outcome was tragic.
Yet half of the equation never suffices to the entire situation.
So what is true, then? Well for one to me, thrice fold to you. Insufferable actions that I shall always regret.
Yet only through static may I transcribe in hopes that it shall reach you, what exactly is in my head.
For surrounded I feel, so I simply kneel and visualize what I must next reach forth so that my soul may deal.
With the absence of you.
Yes, I wronged you.
Many times, for I was out of my mind and interwoven with traumas and pains that were not entirely mine.
I reflected this upon you, true and now that the stars are no longer aligned I see anew, that whatever happened between lovers should have remained as such.
Anger, fear and sadness. A recipe of sudden ferocity. It clings to those that tried passionately and wholeheartedly, to bring a lush jungle to a desert sea.
For that you failed and as did I.
Denied my love entirely to you, I see that now, yet ultimately it was I who denied, you from truly ever breaking through, to a broken down bunker who didn’t see the truth.
For I know what it was, for you just cause.
Yet isolation and dysfunction doesn’t typically bring out the best in any of us, but I sing no troubles to you. For you showed me great love, as I do for you.
I’m happy that you are as such. I wish the best for you.
I wish we visited ruins and secret places when we were in Eden, so young and intertwined, to this day I do.
Now the dungeon bars are receding, I suppose they were in my mind.
As were these dreams of you and I.
For the sorrow is never through, that’s what a wise man told me, especially when you are inherently comfortable with the idea of being momentarily lonely.
Maybe that’s not true. As I know, we both do.
Words, on a screen.
They can’t really convey even slightly, can they? Which is why I type only to erase without a trace.
Exactly what love means to you, me or anybody.
For this is the prime essence of the experience, it can lift you unto bliss enlightenment or render you delirious.
Love, is it ever serious and mysterious.
For we are capable of harnessing it’s true and untapped potential, each and every single of of the Human species is capable of slowing their heart to a standstill and staring into the eyes of the one that let the world fade into eternity, seemingly at will.
We all have someone that does fits that bill, do we not? At the bare minimum we may believe that we thought we did.
Expectations, minimums and maximums are always balancing on a thread.
Please, pardon me world, I’ll bide my time as you play ahead, as we are on a collision course are we not? I’d rather learn and grow instead.
Isn’t that what we would all prefer? Yet there is no detour, to your dreams, as the awakening world is exactly as it seems.
Open your eyes and discover the true means, to love compassionately and wholeheartedly, never give unto your dreams.
This is one message that cannot relent and one that we as free Humans must defend. For I understand the past was broken for many of us, yet now allow it to mend.
As we reap what we sow, I know this to be true. A single time is far too many, to let the love incarnate slip away from you.
Sending you Light through Love,