I lay within an incubator, awaiting the projection of yet another cyclical encounter with the never ending vision that encapsulates my reality.
Indeed, life is merely an accumulation of experience up until the present, awaiting further procession which will further mold the individual into what they appear to be based on the choices and decisions that they make, and what a blessing it is to have to luxury of a choice, or at the very least, the mere illusion of it suffices.
The constant experiment beckoning whether or not change shall be enacted or merely envisioned is entertaining and rather despairing at the same time, for no one other than ourselves happens to know what tomorrow shall bring.
It can bring the same as yesterday, it can bring a mystery, it can certainly alter the course of one’s history within the confines of humanity.
And that is certainly the point after all, to alter within this reality, for the story is meant to change, and there is a beginning, middle and an end, hopefully within there is a magnitude of transformation, the more the better, in order to entice the individual into further exploration of the gift before us, that which is life.
Unfortunately it is ever so easy to forget why the hell we are inhabiting a physical body upon planet earth at times, there is confusion, pain, uncertainly and a creeping chaos that seems to be constantly following us, or possibly I speak solely for myself.
When we forget our purpose in turn, it is incredibly easy to find ourselves wandering in circles, both mentally and physically, throughout each day and night, with no reprieve save for the ingestion of altered states or when our head hits the pillow.
We awaken however, and nothing has changed.
I know not how to enact everlasting change, in fact, promises can be deceiving, especially those which we make to ourselves.
However, there is hope in all things, especially when patience and the will to alter is on ones side.
For there are cycles in the seasons of the earth and within humans too, there are cycles.
If change does not occur, then certainly the entire natural balance of oneself is out of harmony.
Alas, it is exceptionally easy to feel out of balance within a world such as ours, it is easy to lose ourselves in the loops and games that we play in a vain attempt to numb out the truth of our own lives.
I know I am ever so guilty of attempting to annihilate myself if only to shake myself up and attempt rehabilitation further down the line, just before destruction is a certainty.
Certainly this is a wake up call for oneself, the repetition complex must end so that I may mend.
We reap what we sow and it seems as though I have sown nothing but dreams, empty promises and futility as of late, spite the sinner, woe is me, except not even slightly.
For I am blessed, you are blessed, whether we realize this simplicity or not.
Anyways, just wanted to check in with my soul.
Sending you light through love,